Today was my follow up appointment with Dr. Wilde. She was running late from surgery so my 2:15 appointment became 3:00. As I played my Ruzzle Game and Fruit Ninja, she finally came in. It turns out the MRI found 3 more “abnormalities”. Two more in my left breast and now one in my right. These kind of abnormalities can only be found with an MRI so God knows how long I have had them. So instead of scheduling my lump/mastectomy we now had to schedule an MRI Biopsy of all three.
I was very fortunate that they were able to move another person around to get me in this Thursday morning. I have to be there at 6:45 am and plan to be there for about 2 hours. This will be a MRI guided biopsy. I guess I’ll get to spend time with my new best friend, Xanax again. They are calling in another prescription for me. After the biopsy I have to go see Dr. Wilde, yet again, for the results.
Here’s what I know:
- I definitely have DCIS in my left breast
- I have two clumped non mass-like abnormalities in my left breast
- I have one clumped non mass-like abnormality in my right breast
Here’s what I don’t know:
- Are the 3 new items cancer as well?
- Am I having a lumpectomy or now radical mastectomy?
- If the 3 new items are cancer, do I now have to have chemo?
- When the hell is all of this going to come out of my body?
I was really doing well with all this until today. The minute I say it out loud to my mom, that’s when I lose it.
I’m not a religious person, I never have been. I do believe in God but I don’t think it’s necessary to go to a building to speak with him. He’s where ever you find peace within yourself. He and I have been talking a lot lately. I’ve been told we’re never given anymore than we can handle and we find strength around us and within us. I am very lucky to have the best supportive and loving parents, friends I work with or have worked with and even new friends that I have yet to meet, that are there for me. I want you to know, that from the bottom of my heart, I am so grateful that you are in my life and for all your prayers. It is giving me so much strength.
I will post more on Thursday, after me and my friend Xanax have parted ways.